Realizing that I am indeed mortal:

So there I was 33 years old with breast cancer. I went through the gamete of emotions. My first order of business was to take a mental inventory of my life and decide if I was ready to die. Had I lived the kind of life that I was proud of? After much soul searching I decided that I had indeed had a great life. I decided that if I were to die of this disease, I could do it without regret….with one exception. I confessed tearfully to my husband that if I were to die now, my one regret would be not seeing my son grow into a man. Breast cancer unlike many other cancers has an incredibly high survival rate…upwards of 80% largely due to early detection. So what becomes critical is ones ability to live beyond the initial shock of realizing that yes “I am indeed mortal”. On a day to day basis most of us do not put much thought into our mortality. So to come face to face with your mortality in a split second and to face it again and again each day as you examine your bald head in the mirror is a big wake-up call. For me the best way to deal with this daily reality check is to constantly remind myself that everyone is mortal, not just me. The difference between me and everyone else (i.e. those not living with cancer), is that I am keenly aware of my mortality each and every moment of the day. I use this constant reminder of my morality to live each day to the fullest and end each day asking myself “If I were to die tomorrow would I have any regrets?”